Don’t Waste Your Money

When Life Hands You Lemons: Be Fine Rough Spot Lemon Balm

It’s human nature to be seduced by pretty packaging. And we gullible homo sapiens expect that inside said exterior, we’ll find something equally fabulous. Unfortunately, this misguided tendency is the reason why beauty buffs, like myself, end up knee deep in products we were so excited to buy, open and use that don’t live up to our expectations.

Such is the case of Be Fine’s Rough Spot Lemon Balm. The packaging looks like a lemon; it’s so realistic-looking that if I left it lying around, Mr. Spoiled Pretty might take it upon himself to put it in the refrigerator. Unfortunately, the salve hidden inside is such a nothing-to-write-home-about product, it makes total sense that they worked so hard fashioning the container.

First, I assumed that the balm would actually smell fresh and citrusy…and it does, if you sniff really, really hard. Secondly, you literally have to dig the balm out with your fingernail to get any product in your hands. Finally, the balm is so greasy, it’s a hazard to your clothing, couch and carpet.

So what’s a beauty addict to do when life hands her lemons? Yep…make lemonade. So I dug into the salve with my nail and spread that grease balm all over my heels, arches and toes. Then I covered my tootsies with some old gym socks and let it marinate for a bit. Twenty minutes later, I did a preliminary check and was shocked to find that my feet had completely absorbed all of the product – but they didn’t feel softer or more moisturized…not at all.

Rough Spot Lemon Balm was disappointing – on so many levels – that I cannot recommend this product, despite the package’s high kitsch factor. One thing the product did accomplish, though, was to remind me about the awesomeness of Burt’s Bees Coconut Foot Crème.

Slather it on, slide on some socks and hit the hay. In the morning, you’ll swear the magic foot fairy made a late-night house call.

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HIP Color Presso: Spoiled Pretty Is Not ImPressed

I really wanted to love the new HIP Color Presso lipglosses from L’Oreal Paris. I really did. Unfortunately, I can’t think of one reason to recommend this product to all of you.

The concept is great…a duo of glosses that blend together to create an infinite array of shades. But a cool concept can’t redeem a mediocre product. First of all, the odd packaging feels and looks cheap…and it’s got this little loop at the top that I just don’t get. It’s as if L’Oreal designed it so that you could put it on your key ring…or hang it on your Christmas Tree.

Secondly, you have to squeeze the lipgloss chambers to dispense the product onto the applicator; I was expecting a dial or button…so having to squeeze the two tubes simultaneously just upped the cheap factor. Finally, the color (I have Snazzy) was just okay. Nothing to write home about. In fact, I kinda loathed the honeydew melon half of the twosome. So if I continue to use my Color Presso, I’ll probably just end up wearing the other shade by itself. Furthermore, Color Presso costs $13. Personally, I wouldn’t pay half that for this lipgloss.

The product smells and wears exactly like HIP Jelly Balms, which I absolutely adore. So do yourself a favor – if you were contemplating a Color Presso purchase, just buy a Jelly Balm instead.

Spoiled Pretty’s Take On Smooth Away

So I survived the Spokane snow I’m back in Philadelphia. And you know what that means. It’s time to weigh in on Smooth Away, the hair removal discs sold on TV.

My sister wasn’t exaggerating when he said that the mini Smooth Away pad deftly defuzzes your upper lip. The superfine crystals on each pad exfoliate – buffing away dead skin in addition to hair. But if you have sensitive skin, put the pad down…don’t buff nuthin’. I smoothed away my mustache three days ago and my skin is still raw and tore up. It feels like I have a rug burn below my nose – and there are a few small spots that look and feel slightly scabby.

To be thorough in my testing, I also used one of the larger Smooth Away pads on my leg. As the skin on my leg is more resilient thant that on my face, I didn’t experience any irritation. The pad removed the hair – although, afterwards, it did feel a smidge stubbly to the touch. Another Smooth Away shortcoming is that you’ll go through the pads fairly quickly. The pads are most effective when they’re brand new and haven’t yet been used; and once you start buffing, you’ll notice that the efficacy of the pads will start to diminish.

One Smooth Away kit contains: 1 Large Smooth Away, 1 Small Smooth Away, 4 Large Smooth Away Replacement Pads, 4 Small Smooth Away Replacement Pads. And right now, when you purchase one kit at $14.99, you’ll receive an extra kit for free. But I doubt that having two Smooth Away sets will keep you smooth and hair-free for long. Depending on the length and texture of your hair, one large pad will likely lose it’s grit after one leg.

Bottom line: Smooth Away is, indeed, a throwaway.

L’Oreal Bare Naturale Gentle Lip Conditioner Tastes Like You Bought It At GNC

I’m a big fan of L’Oreal (it doesn’t get much better than HIP JellyBalm or Skin Genesis Daily Moisturizer Oil-Free Lotion), but I’ve got something to say about their Bare Naturale Gentle Lip Conditioner and it isn’t pretty.

The preservative-free, fragrance-free lip soother is 96% natural and does a decent job of conditioning lips while adding a sheer tint to your pucker. But must it taste and smell like old-school Metamucil? For real, it tastes like some supplement that you’d buy at GNC.

Surely there’s a way to add some fruit juices or bubblegum essence to this product without rendering it carcinogenic. Don’t ask me how, I’m no scientist…just putting it out there. And it’s $10! I don’t know about you, but if I’m shelling out that much for .11 ounces of lip balm, I want some flava.

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